Monday, August 8, 2011

Sarra Visits from Seattle!

Sarra came to visit me!! Oh my god, it was such an awesome week!

Well, right before I left for the airport, I discovered an uninvited visitor hiding in my bathroom drawer. Scared the ever-loving shit out of me because, when I pulled open the drawer, all I saw was teeth.

Please note the leaves, as the little bastard was nesting.

On to the airport!

Oh my god, it's Sarra!!!

We stopped at a gas station where she claims to have seen the largest selection of pork rinds of Earth but didn't take a picture so I can't verify that. Then we went to Waffle House because, hello, she's visiting the have to go to the Waffle House.

Waffle House! This becomes a theme.

Auburn's mascot is the tiger so there a several tiger statues around town. We took pictures with a couple of them. That's what you do in at the Waffle House and take pictures with tigers.

It was Mel's birthday so we headed over to the little get-together she was having at the Irish Bred Pub. Apparently I feel soft “like a creampuff.” Which is, truly, the greatest compliment ever.

Carter deep throating cupcakes. She's a filthy whore and that's one of the reasons why I love her as much as I do.

And this is the best/most accurate photo of me drunk ever. Tits to the wind and a fucked up look on my face.'re welcome.

Then we went over to Mel and Carter's house for a bit.

Aaaaand, Waffle House.

We headed to Clanton, Alabama to witness their peachy glory. Peach water tower! Peach statue! Peach ice cream!

Also, pickled green beans. I could have eaten a pound of them.

B came to visit us! She's been reading me for about a decade now so we finally met in person.

We started out by eating at Cheeburger Cheeburger. Then went to the lake in Chewacla State Park. We spent hours in the water. It was amazing and so incredibly beautiful.

For dinner we headed over to Niffer's for fried foods and tasty beverages.

Then we stayed up until 3am, listening to music and talking. It was like a sleepover!

We stayed in all day as we were all exhausted and I was hurting like crazy. I decided it was the perfect time to bleach and dye my hair since I had someone I could wrangle into helping me with it. Fat girls sitting around in their underwear, with dye in their hair...that has to be a fetish for someone, right?

We decided on picking up Mellow Mushroom for dinner and I still had dye on my hair so I said fuck it and left it on since I wasn't getting out of the car. I ended up waiting around in my house dress with foil and a plastic cap on my head. I'm one classy bitch, let me tell you.

We got back and I rinsed out the dye. I was going with turquoise and purple but, for some reason, the purple turned out dark blue on me. So, ta da, I have mermaid hair! I cut off way more than I intended. But it's summer and it's only'll grow back.

I was hurting so I knocked out early,

Sarra and I said our goodbyes to B and decided to head down to Pensacola, Florida for a night. The drive felt a lot quicker than I expected. Look, a new state!

Before collapsing in our room, we ate at Waffle House. And agreed we were beyond Waffle Housed out and had no desire to eat it again. Possibly ever.

Holy christ on a cracker, it was hot!

We had much exploring to do! First up: the UFO House and the Igloo House!

Then we headed to the Shark Museum, which I've wanted to see for ages. It was awesome. Sadly, their massive souvenir selection was bereft of actual shark items.

Apparently I was amputated by the shark...

Then we took silly pictures and dug our toes in the sand.

We hadn't eaten in 14 hours...Sarra was disapleased.

After lunch, we went to one of the original mini golf courses. Luckily, they were closed so we could just take pictures instead of having to pretend to play. Oh my god, it was hot. Hotter than I remember ever experiencing. We both, honestly, thought we were going to pass out from the heat. It was, like, mental breakdown inducing heat. But that place was worth the horrors.

We headed back to Auburn – with the air conditioning cranked – and stopped at Cracker Barrel along the way. Oddly enough, I'd never been. I've been curious, since it's a southern institution, but never went. Sarra wanted to pick up some southern goodies so we ate dinner there. It was...okay? I guess? A lot of food. Not particularly great food but you get a lot of it!

Sarra's last day. Major sad face.

She really wanted to go to Toomer's Drugstore and I was excited to make that happen; it being another Auburn institution I hadn't experienced.

The lemonade was delicious and I ordered a pimento cheese sandwich. Um. It was...interesting? It was so not what I was expecting. It was, like, some weird fake Mexican cheese dip on bread. Yikes. I mean, I'm glad I ate it since it was on my weird-shit-to-try list but I'll never eat it again.

Sniffle, then my Sarra left me. But it was one hell of a week!

As always, more photos on flickr.


  1. I just had pimento for the first time this weekend when I was in Wilmington, NC as part of my Southern palate appetizer plate. I'm with you, I thought it was ick. The flavored pecans however were deelicous.

  2. I used to live in Pensacola, that golf course is literally right down the road from where I used to live. That's awesome that you went there!

  3. I want to go to pretty much every eatery you mentioned. I can't believe I drove through the South (Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama, a teeny piece of Georgia, Tennessee, Virginia and West Virginia) without stopping at ONE Waffle House.

    Also, whatever that swirly drink is in the second picture from the pub looks amazing.

  4. Ok, please do not give up on pimento cheese - not until you try this recipe:

    It makes a ton, so feel free to cut it in half or quarters, but srsly...if it's done right, it's amazing.

  5. What a lot of experiences and restaurants (except for Waffle House) you packed into one visit. It looks like all of you had a grand time together. Thanks for sharing the photos. I especially loved your new turquoise and blue hair with your purple sleeveless!

  6. Thank you for sharing your pics of Florida! I haven't been in ages and I could almost feel the warm air on my face and smell the ocean! I spent a lot of the late 70s and 80s in and around mini-golf parks, so I probably went to that one! Thanks!

  7. 1. Love the pix!
    2. "I ended up waiting around in my house dress with foil and a plastic cap on my head. I'm one classy bitch, let me tell you." -- made me LOL at work
    3. What if there were snakes in the lake?! I have a fear of lakes/rivers in the south because of SNAKES!
    4. A critter in your bathroom drawer!? OMG LOL.

  8. Heidi, it is great to see and hear you looking and sounding so happy, respectively! May your happiness continue and grow!

  9. I've never been to the South, but is there some sort of fascination with weird statues down there? I see tigers, peaches, sharks, etc.?

  10. Hmmm, this is a good question. I think part of it is that there's a to of open space so weird random statues are more feasible in a physical way. And there's not as big of a risk of vandalism in these small towns. Overall though? I have NO idea why they exist but am damn excited that they do!

  11. Heidi, I had so much fun with you and Sarra! And since you didn't post any of our incriminating pics (naked hair-dying, anyone?), you could have used my name after all. But thanks for keeping me anonymous like I asked! I can't wait to see you again sometime (and you, too, Sarra)! Remember: fat chicks know how to party and have all the best accessories! <3