Saturday, October 2, 2010

An Ending

It's done. I'm out of the house. The last week or so has been...I don't even have a word for it. I'm sitting here trying to come up with one but just keep shaking my head. I got nothin'. We'll go with "something I want to never have to do again."

All told, I donated around 175 boxes of stuff. Plus piles of misc. things that didn't fit in boxes. And probably two dozen bags of clothes. I kept no furniture. My possessions now include: my laptop and external hard drive, my camera, five pairs of shoes, four handbags, 20% of my clothes, less than 5% of my makeup/beauty stuff, pictures, maybe 1/2 a shoebox of jewelry and the same of hair accessories, my father's ashes, my family's jewelry, two boxes of books, one box of dvds, whatever CDs I already had in my car, maybe two boxes of random things, Futurama bobbleheads, some plushes from My Paper Crane, a couple of pieces of art, aaaaand that might be it. Oh, and one motherfucking box of papers. Everything I now own fits in a Ford Focus.

I'm staying with my friend, Janet. Last night I took a hot shower and then sat in an air conditioned room while my laptop charged. It was bliss. The pain is still so bad that I can barely walk or stand. But I feel calm for the first time in months. I'm expecting to head out on the 6th. I seriously need to make a list of everything I have to do beforehand. After the last few weeks, driving 2,100 miles will seem like a vacation in itself.

So, that’s it. Almost time for the new life to start. “Terror” isn’t a big enough word. But neither is “excitement.”

Thank you. For listening to me bitch and moan. For telling me I can do this even when I really don’t think I can. For everything.

17 comments:

  1. I can't wait to hear about all of your adventures! Oh and on the books... I got something from the USPS saying they found packaging with nothing inside of it.. I have to file a claim... so at least we know they are floating around somewhere in the world
    <3 Jela

    ReplyDelete
  2. I honestly didn't think you could do it but I wasn't about to say so until you proved me wrong. There is nothing for you to feel terror over now, it's done. "It" being the physical things that held you back and a lot of the mental too.

    I'm proud of you, for what that is worth.

    ReplyDelete
  3. {{{{{Hugs}}}}

    You deserve lots of them - and booze :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am so proud of you!! You're making things happen for yourself and you will be SO much better off in the end! Stay strong!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Good for you to have the courage to go ahead with this. Cleaning out the "clutter" in your life is going to be so freeing. By that, I mean leaving the bad vibes behind and looking towards the future. YOu have a lot of friends and I think you are going to be just fine. I hope you keep on blogging so we all can follow you to your new beginnings....Good Luck, Blessings upon you and GO GET EM, GIRL!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Love you Heidi! You can do it! xoxox

    ReplyDelete
  7. excited for you!
    and yeah, i actually do think driving the 2100 miles will be fun.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Despite not knowing you, I am so proud of you. This is taking a lot of determination and a whole hell of a lot of courage. I'm so glad you're on your way!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Congratulations on donating so much!

    I suggest the word Teritement.

    ReplyDelete
  10. You are awesome. I can't wait to read about your new life in Alabama! So excited for you!

    ReplyDelete
  11. This is great. Seriously great. :D Hey, how'd you get your car back?

    Be sure to update on the road!

    ReplyDelete
  12. See, you're doing it! Finally getting out of the house is a HUGE step! I've done the part cross country drive (PA/DE to TX) in different directions 3 times now. The main advise I can give you is to not rush/to take your time and use your driving alone time to reflect and plan and take care of YOU! You're going to feel a huge weight lifted off your shoulders when you land at your destination for a day or two, then you'll feel lost as you try to jump start all those goals, but you can do it!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Good luck on your new adventures:)

    ReplyDelete
  14. I've made a similar move (though under far less stressful circumstances) several times and it'll be worth it. Once you reach that place where you can hit the 'reset' button and let go of all (or most) of the old stuff/memories/etc., it'll be worth it. Safe travels! <3

    ReplyDelete

If you're asking a question, please include your email address in your comment so I can contact you! <3